Author: Jaime O. Perez
Question: If you were asked to advise Pena Nieto, what would be the best nationalist response to Trump’s executive orders and policy relative to Mexico?
Answer: The Private Communique
By Jaime O. Perez
The Private Communique
Pena Nieto to Trump
January 26, 2017
The Honorable Donald J. Trump
President
United States of America
Mr. President:
On behalf of my government and the Mexican people, I wish to congratulate you on your election. You are the leader of the world’s strongest and most admired country. I fully concur with the sentiment of your declaration that, from this point forward, you will always put America First. Certainly, I always consider the interests of my fellow citizens, the interests of my country, as my singular goal, commitment and focus.
It was my desire to meet with you in Washington and explore how we can come to an agreement relative to how to work together and promote our mutual best interests.
I took note you set forth the precondition my government must first agree to underwrite the cost of a dividing wall between our two nations. I note as well that, since then, you have entertained public discussion that tariffs, on goods my country exports to the American market, might be needed in order to undergird the potential $20 billion dollar cost .
You have indicated you have the intention of deporting 4 to 7 million of my fellowcitizens in order to create jobs for your countrymen and you have signaled your intention to recall American manufacturing concerns back to America. Your call to renegotiate our free trade agreement, styled NAFTA, has been heard loud and clear by the Mexican people. You did, after all, promise to bring jobs back to the United States and make your country great again.
After careful consideration, I have decided not to attend our scheduled meeting. In my view, discussions between mature leaders must be engaged in good faith and without preconditions. The context, within which our negotiations would have taken place, violated these principles.
However, the above notwithstanding, I am happy to see you in Mexico at your earliest possible convenience. You are always welcome in Mexico and my administration will not set any any preconditions for negotiations with you. We respect you too much.
As a sign of good faith, please know I am happy to accept the imposition of a 20% tariff increase on our exports to your country and will gladly accept 30 – 35% if this helps you and your economy. I certainly understand the pressure you must be under to produce jobs. I am not unmindful of the fact you must look ahead to reelection.
Moreover, I am happy to facilitate the return of any American manufacturing concerns that may wish to repatriate to the United States. My government wants to do business with those that want to do business with us and, it would not be prudent nor respectful of the free market principles we believe in to restrain or impede such repatriation.
My government is happy to re-open negotiations relative to NAFTA or, if you wish, cancel the Treaty altogether.
I do, respectfully, request your good offices in handling the deportation of our citizens. My government’s 50 consular offices stand ready to assist in the deportation you may engage consistent with your laws. Please know, we will encourage our citizens to avail themselves of any legal remedies open to them. Of course, you understand that my people will not permit my government to simply surrender on all these matters without a reasonable and sensible quid pro quo.
With the greatest respect for your countrymen, I will set a 60 day window for all US citizens in my country in similar circumstances to my compatriots in your country, to leave Mexico and we are happy to have them appeal deportation in our Courts. As you are aware, many US citizens retire in Mexico and do not have documents in order, although, here we do not refer to them as illegal.
In addition, please know my country will cease the importation of various grain and technological products from your country in order to engage a fresh bi-lateral trade negotiation. I am sure you will agree this is a very reasonable response to your decision to impose tariffs on my country’s exports. My government will maintain this policy until such time, if ever, you may choose to rescind the tariffs.
In the interim, I request our respective actions be coordinated before we make them public in order that my government may ‘save face’. On this latter point, I am sure you will understand I will take two small but very symbolic steps in order for the People of Mexico to be satisfied I am truly defending the Mexican National Interest. I will ask your military advisers, DEA and FBI advisers and consultants to leave, in addition to your American Embassy staff, whom we both know are all CIA operatives. I will of course ask the Ambassador to remain. I am very fond of him and he will be needed as we continue our dialogue.
I sincerely, hope you are not bluffing and, indeed, have a firm commitment to the voters that gave you the honor of leading the greatest country in the world. I would consider a failure of follow-through on your promises to build a wall, deport my countrymen, impose Mexican import tariffs, recall your manufacturing concerns, and scrap NAFTA in favor of a bilateral agreement, deeply disappointing.
Your Servant
With Warmest Regards,
Enrique Pena Nieto
President
Estados Unidos Mexicanos
Nicely said. We have missed you, Jaime.
His Excellency
Pena Nieto, President
Mexico
Dear Mr. President;
I am in receipt of your letter of the 26th instant and wish to reply so we are perfectly understood. We agree there are some 4 to 7 million Mexicans illegally resident in the USA. To deport them to Mexico would, as we both know, collapse your economy causing social and political unrest. How would you employ them? House them? I propose a deal so I can keep my promise to the American people to build a wall that Mexico pays for.
The USA will accept a ransom of $10,000 for each illegal migrant that we don’t deport to Mexico.
This fairly compensates us for the tremendous burden on our social systems that illegals have caused us for decades now, It will also benefit the illegal as the USA will grant them citizenship upon payment by Mexico to the USA of the $10,000 ransom. It will also keep them out of Mexico, doing your country a great benefit, too, as they will find employment and remit funds to family in Mexico. Maybe even vacation there occasionally as they will prosper in America 🙂
Win-win. What do you say, Amigo?
The Honorable Donald J. Trump
President
United States of America
His Excellency
Pena Nieto, President
Mexico
Dear Mr. President, I cant make the meeting becuase im to busy stealing money from the government and setting up offshore accounts for me and my trophy Novela actress wife. I only have 2 years left and time is important. I had to even raise the gas tax on Pemex so I could have more to take with me. I hope you understand. This is the way things have been done all the way bag to Lopez Portillo. However, I will try not to have anyone murdered like one of our previous President’s Salinas Gortari. On second thought, Senior Bush, George Bush, and Clinton allowed him to come to the U.S. and teach at Ivy League Schools so i may have to reconsider that one Because my wife is starting to lose her looks and there is some nice young trim at the U.S. Universities. thanks, Nieto
p.s. By the way your wife is hot.