My Beef (This Time)

Satire – I don’t know why I, 400 lbs of lard aka ol’Jaimy LiarStar, aka Dead Beat Dad, bother smack talking about people. That Captain Phasma bullshit works around the Lower Valley where most elected officials are either too afraid to stand up to me or feel it’s not worth the effort of making an enemy of someone who clearly routinely takes shit too far.  Like all the times I call members of the State delegation and threaten them for not endorsing W’hordaz or my beloved Vinny.  “I’m so far up their donkey it’s not even funny” The only reason I get away with my bull manure is that no one wants to call the chota on me.  If they did, who cares, my Big Ears Montoia will take care of me just like he did when I was showing nuddie pictures and I was voted dad of the year.   You memmer!  Yes, you memmer.  If you don’t memmer just click on this link http://www.jaimeabeytia.com

I, on the other hand, don’t give a damn who I think I am.  The ol’LiarStar, that’s me. I consider myself a public figure and fancy myself running campaigns and I’m entitled to the same scrutiny as everyone else. I mean, do I really have to go into the ol’LiarStar criminal records archives to show all my records over the years?  If you want to see my extensive criminal records you can find them at www.lionstarblog.com

I don’t know what the hell made me start in on myself lately, but I don’t turn the other cheek, I turn my lonja and by now you should know that little school yard bully bullshit I use in the Lower Valley works very well.

So aside from talking smack, I’m injecting myself in local races and writing lies and making shit up in various places. The one thing you need to know about ol’LiarStar – if you don’t already – is that I only do things in the interest of my D.C. Madam or my beloved Vinny, ooooh, my be-love-ed Vinny mmmm.

When I’m unhinged and berating people at meetings, I extend my hand for a hand out to receive cold hard cash from Big Ears or Lie’da for work I do for them.  I hate Chenti’s Pachangas because he doesn’t invite me. I put up signs for elected officials and hold them up at public events in an attempt to bully myself into their hearts.  They only care about their own interests but they keep me around because I’m a useful idiot.

So I’ll get right to the point on this one. You know why I’ve been on a tirade about Ms. T aka Ta-ma-yo? Word around the courthouse and the State House is she’s running against my D.C Madam, my fantasy, my, you get it.  I’m also mad that my ex, mama lion, got awarded custody of my child because the father, that would be me ol’LiarStar, am a deadbeat dad that doesn’t pay child support.  Why would I pay when all the money that Big Ears, Lie’da, my D.C. Madam or my beloved Vinny is paid to me in cold hard cash, no records, no paper trail.

I have a personal beef with anyone who tries to take on my bought and paid for D.C Madam or my beloved Vinny.  Just ask Ms. T and the Holqeens. That is what it is all about. And I’m going through some weird ass extremes related to my wet dreams that I don’t want exposed.

Now you know what my personal beef is.